Today felt like the first day of the 2012 sales season, for no other reason than a) there was a sale b) I made an effort to get to it and c) I purchased items. And although I'm not completely committed to using the patented apron rating system throughout the year, I thought it would be fun to get it out at least for Opening Day. So let's give a shout-out and an apron
for the Pyrex Friendship refrigerator set, complete and in good condition. An auspicious beginning.
Oh, not so fast.
I arrived at the sale at 6 a.m., signed the list and waited 2 hours for my number, which was 21. It was an OK number. Not great, but not terrible, and I wasn't all that concerned because with a nice big split-level house with a garage and an attic, I wasn't worried about being among the first wave of people to go in.
Except the woman running the sale decided to let 20 people in. Which would have been tolerable had the house actually been crowded. But it was not. From my vantage point ONE INCH from the entrance, I watched my rivals shop leisurely. They made one pass through the kitchen. Another. A third. I thought I would lose my mind. The negative apron above is for wanting to dash my forehead against the door until it was a bloody pulp.
This apron is for me telling the man guarding the door that I was never coming to one of his company's sales again.
It was purgatory. Mainly because I could see the Pyrex so close I could touch it. It would have been actual hell if somebody actually picked it up while I was watching.
Reliving this experience has made me get up and pour myself a soothing glass of Sauvignon Blanc.
Finally, the woman running the sale allowed five more people in. (She could have let in 50. It was just crazy.)
I grabbed the Pyrex. On another pass through the kitchen (yes, I now was the one making leisurely passes through the premises) I got more Pyrex.
Delightful individual casserole dishes. Sorry, no more aprons. Only one Pyrex apron per sale. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them. Actually, I do make the rules. What awesome power this is!
I discovered the super-secret cubbyhole of Christmas ornaments. I was especially happy to find a box with six strands of glass bead garland, which I seem to have a hard time finding.
An apron for glass bead garland. Not that there's anything the matter with nice old tinsel, a few Shiny Brites and some oddly endearing Santa ornaments.
Some kind-of cute Easter decorations. I'm just going to get this out of the way here: not a fan of Easter. Somewhere along the way, it became my elderly relatives' favorite weekend on which to die. Don't ask. The numbers would shock you. I hope I don't have to give myself a negative apron for my conflicted feelings about Easter.
Moving on: this feels like a good time for a cute alert.
I'm about to award another apron
So it's a two-apron sale. With the possibility of a third, if the bracelet I picked up on a whim turns out to be Bakelite.