Saturday's sales were not a complete loss. I got a few things - emphasis on few. What's more important is that I was able to complete my research into "community yard sales" and construct a model with which we can predict CYS outcomes when dimensions are calibrated and duration inputs are utilized.
In other words: You can tell how good a community yard sale will be if you know how many years it's been around.
My research reveals four distinct stages to the CYS:
1) Nascent: The community yard sale is a loosely organized, poorly publicized, nearly accidental collection of sales among neighbors who have tons of stuff to unload. It is excellent. Tons of great stuff, and it's all incredibly cheap. Sadly, hardly anyone knows about it. It's one of the cruel ironies of the CYS.
2) Year A: There's a bit of a buzz about the sale because previous year(s) have been so good. A neighbor takes it upon himself/herself to place an advertisement. Because this is the first year the sale is "official," selection remains excellent and prices are competitive.
Example: I found these and these at Year A of the community yard sale.
3) Year B: The sale reaches its full flower. Customers talk about how good the sale was last year, and more vendors set up shop. Selection is still very good, as are the prices.
Example: I found this, this and this at Year B of the community yard sale.
4) Year C: Everybody in the community has a yard sale. All of the people with good stuff sold it in Years A and B, and so the selection is poor. Prices, however, are exponentially higher. People who previously were just happy to get rid of their junk now make fancy price tags with the name of their "shoppe."
Sadly, this was Year C of the sale. Yes, I found a Gurley snowman still in its original cellophane for 15 cents. (Shown here with a skiing instruction book and a little wooden cabin that's getting a makeover).

But I had to wander through a vortex of Hannah Montana merchandise to get it. I really try to live my life in such a way that I have barely any idea of who Hannah Montana is. This exposure was very upsetting.
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A stack of old honey labels.
Vintage upholstery fabric.
A large framed print of sheep. I will buy anything that depicts farm animals.
On the subject of farm animals, this community yard sale takes place along one of my favorite highways, with many barns and pastures filled with cows. There are old rural cemeteries and an honest-to-goodness general store.

Among the linens I found was this nearly finished Vogart sampler. Even someone with my short attention span should be able to finish up that cross-stitching.
Before I show you the favorite thing I found, I'll tell you about my favorite thing that happened. I stopped at a just-awful sale, but there was a little portable pen set up in the front yard, and in it were nine one-month-old golden retriever puppies. Nothing in the world is cuter than a golden retriever puppy. And there were nine of them.


















(two aprons per puppy)
The little girl whose family owned the puppies offered to let me climb in the cage with them. That did not seem like a great idea, but her mother piped up "Why don't you just hand one to her?" and she did, and the puppy snuggled up underneath my chin and made those cute little snuffly puppy noises


















(18 more aprons for a snuggling, snuffling puppy)
I forgot there is one more thing before my favorite thing (which, trust me, isn't all that great). I've always had such great luck finding quilts at this sale.
So I bought this quilt. It is, without a doubt, The Most Boring Quilt in the World. I'm pretty sure the reason it's just a quilt top and not a finished quilt is because the quilter fell into a deep sleep every time she got it out to work on. So why did I buy it, you ask? Because it is chockablock full of awesome old homespun, including homespun in lavender and a pretty aqua-blue, and it will make some quilter happy.
Here's my favorite thing, an old painted sampler in perfect condition. I'm giving it an apron.

So here's the tally:
One apron for a fresh Gurley - an apron for Hannah Montana exposure + an apron for good scenery + 36 aprons for golden retriever puppies + a general merchandise including painted sampler apron = 38 aprons, minus 35 aprons because even though the puppies deserve 36 aprons only one of them counts =



Three aprons. And that's only because of the puppies. It was definitely more of a two-apron day.
I expect to add to my research next year, which will be Year D: the year you go to the CYS not because you expect to find anything but because you just want to make sure you didn't miss anything.